I'm at the bass pro shop. They have a river full of trout and turtles, a shooting range, a full bar, and the patriots cheerleaders are here. I now understand why people are rednecks. I may never leave
just stole 2 cases of forties from some freshman in the woods by pretending to be a cop. that ten dollar spotlight is really turning a profit
Why am I the only one concerned that there's a dog in the movie theatre?
Sometimes you just need a break, and sometimes you also need to get stoned on these breaks. I sound like some kind of fucked up mr rogers when I say shit like that.
Btw. Made out with a random kid at a frat. It's all good though. He invited us to his frat party tomorrow so yay! For having plans!
She was kinda cute. So long as you don't mind neck tattoos and bad life choices.
I don't care if he got kidnapped by a cult one time he is a dick
you can't just say no to brian. he was bugging me to get me to drunk for 14 hours straight yesterday. HE DOESN'T GIVE UP
I didnt realize until i got your email that what i've been missing in my life is someone to send me dog gifs
yeah she's crazy. she fought a possum in my alley because it was "being a cagey little cunt"
Last night was like blooper reel sex. He dropped me!!
Well in other news, my nipples are healing pretty well but next time I get drunk and decide to pierce something please for the love of god stop me!
I take Paypal, cash, sexual favors, and roasted red potatoes with garlic as payment. You choose.
I'm praying to the gods of sex we both get laid this weekend. Amen. Love you
After this weekend, all I can think about is bald eagles flying in front of fireworks and giving birth to fucking uncle sam. Also, beer.
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