quick i need to know how implid consent works for golf carts
too late i think im gettin a gcui
wait, did i just see you litter out your window??
umm, i have a hybrid. it cancels out.
i just made an omelette with the cheese and ham from a lunchables. and ketchup packets
julia child would be proud.
had a convo with my professor before class while peeing... new level of awkward or a breakthrough in our relationship? i feel like there is no longer a professional boundary.
I took my pants off in the cab and tried to bite his ear. Not going oout for awhile
She's echoing.. Her head must be in the toilet..
She basically needs a man who will never act up and take all of her shit
I'm even having trouble finding a guy who's taller than me with no unibrow.. someone needs to tell her its time to lower her standards
When we do our power hour over Skype I'm just going to sit on the toilet so that way I won't have to get up in the middle of it and miss any shots
It's like he drunk calls 6 times for me to come over, but can't say hello at lunch.
Finally liberated my Star Trek DVD from my booty call's house. Captain Kirk would be so proud.
I basically have the attention span of a ferret on meth when it comes to men
I can't remember what I did last night, but judging from the state of my hair I had a pretty good time.
I'm like a sensual ninja. You turn your head for a second and.... BOOM I'm naked. It's like a naughty magic trick.
Aww well I’m kinda unsober so probably best
Lucky bitch I'm at work covered in Jeff pee. And my hair smells like beer because I was trying to prove a point about PBR serving multiple purposes.
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