fine then we can just have courtesy sex i definetly won't like it
what is TOTES MCGOATS in spanish?
I've never had a better reason to do blow of a Pittsburgh strippers ass than to try and keep pace with my dad.
You are forgiven. I sent you a picture of a pumpkin man as a gesture of reconciliation.
Pretty sure I just heard the turkey yell "don't put me in there" as it was going in the oven. way too high for this holiday.
My mom just saw the bruise on my chest from the bite mark he left. Played it off that I hit myself w a box of beauty products. She believed me. God I love working retail sometimes.
How was the rest of your night?
A little fuzzy and a lot naked.
Update: it wasn't just our driver. This ticket confirms that the Royal Oak PD also found our behavior on the party bus to be "Lewd and Indecent."
and somewhere between crying in her arms and throwing up in her front yard, we became friends.
My sister was borrowing my phone when the sext came through. She just said "wow. He's got a nice dick!" Then went on like nothing happened. Outed by a dick pic and its no big deal. Best sister ever.
Fucking that physical therapist guy was the best decision I ever made.
Regardless of your intentions, deep throating a Twinkie is NOT sexy. You owe that poor cashier an apology the next time you pump gas.
He claimed he was the best ass eater of the south. He was right.
I'm sending him pics of me in my new lingerie telling him to come over and when he gets here I'll have changed into like sweats and a 5 year old shirt with ketchup stains on it
The dogs decided to play a new game called "Who Can Scream the Loudest?"
I won.
Randomize
