I didn't know that people actually queef. Is this a real thing?
I believe so, yes.
Would you be offended if I asked if it has happened to you?
she looked like she should be chained to micheal vicks radiator
i can't believe you bought a jetta. you know that's a girl car, right? if i hadn't had sex with you, i'd have no other proof you're straight.
i just watched kanye west and taylor swift have a chugging contest. why cant halloween be every day
The hardest part of getting a new computer is deliberating whether to start the cycle of porn and viruses all over again.
once the "do it" chant starts, any shot at an even remotely dignified party experience is dead.
He choked me out. i woke up to poo. I dont think i like S&M
I feel like im in a tornado of daylight savings, tequila and death
So you walked 4 miles to get home but stopped by the store first to get a vegetable tray? How drunk were you?
The entire time I'm blowing him she's in the back seat lecturing me on the reasons why you're not suppose to do that while they're driving...
My dating life has become some fucked up hydra of dicks; you cut one off and two pop up in its place.
Sneezing cum all over the table was not the highlight of the family reunion if that tells you anything
Waffles and pussy, what else is there?
I have a guy for practically everything... except for making me waffles on demand. will u be my waffle guy?
Who did he bring home?
Idk. But did you see her shoe choice by the stairs, I'm really not expecting anything great.
Randomize
