I hate having morals and standards the next morning.
honestly, magaritas are the void men can't fill.
I'm not upset with you; I'm upset with Fox News.
Immaculate conception is definitely the most boring way to conceive a child.
you were carrying a trash bag around insisting it was your purse. I'll let you guess how your night went
better to have posed nude and lost than to never have posed nude at all...thats what i always say
I knew it was time to leave Waffle House when you started singing "What's Your Fantasy" to your hash browns.
he got a rim job in the basement.
apparently i was the one who gave it to him.
Well I consider my vagina a dear friend. She treats me good I treat her good. We work together. Glad we could be of service.
I bet George Washington got SERIOUS head back in his hay day.
I think you just have to raise your bang age from 40 to 50, hope dust doesn't fly out and make her say tony danza
Do me a favor and don't mention him I feel like Regina George and I just want to scream I made him
Wow. Memory lane. What a horrendously unsightly jizz stain on the tapestry of life.
Because I'm sitting in a bath of my own wisdom and drowning my sorrows in coconut rum
I can feel the shame as I walk down your hallway.. good night
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