your horoscope this morning...very interesting...good luck today
if you force a hooker to have sex with you and dont pay her would it be rape or theft? something to ponder
You know you're wathing too much reality TV when you start adding commentary to every day life.
spending the week with her family was quite possibly the longest ive ever gone without having a boner
I don't care. I'm going to fuck John's friend and it's all your fault.
Dude I just ripped my new jeans climbing out the window so his booty call wouldn't realize I was home. Being his roommate should come with hazard pay
Idk. The last coherent text said something about $25 & dimes. And then...it's just letters...
just used my amazon order history to figure out my anniversary. I am the most epic/shittiest bf ever...
I'm supposed to nail the old lady at 1:30 so I'll see you at 1:35ish.
Ive been high since the plane left the ground in Los Angeles and Ive been in Chicago. Right now, Im on a train headed towards downtown to go to an anime convention. At this point, I am just taking life as it comes, furries and all.
You have no idea the kind of bodily contortions I had to do to access your neighbor's WIFI
That was the night I passed out and someone threw chicken at me. SORRY I wasn't available to cockblock you from that Hispanic dude.
I also farted in bed this morning and said, "I don't even care. My body deserves that."
SOME DUDE PUT OUT FOR A MCCHICKEN AND YET YOU STILL WON'T FUCK ME
You really do take on your dog's personality she sounded like her pug breathing when we were going at it.
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