Someone's got a whale tail
A thong is hangin out?
No, a fatty following them
I just googled dawgpound, shoulda seen that pornsite coming
Just spent 45mins blow drying a joint i dropped in a beer....i felt like i dropped his infant child....
Girls only wine night turned into a sloppy drunk lesbian orgy again
He took naked pictures of me and told me if I ever got to the Disney Channel level of fame he would help me out. I think i'm in love
Idgaf if he's a manwhore, he's like the mt. everest of penises. howcan I NOT try to put that inside me?
I honestly wish you had parked the car in the terminal garage and fucked me in the backseat but I guess I should be more forward
I have come to realize that my purpose in life is less musical and more as a filter of alcohol into water.
do you remember the random banging on my door at 3 am wearing 2 budlight cases as a dress
6 beers, 3 orange crushes, & half a fire ball later & you get my alter ego.
I decided I was tough enough to wax my bikini area myself. Long story short, I'll be drunk when you get home
Step 1: chug a red bull vodka with no ice Step 2: chase that with a shot of wild turkey Step 3: chase that with a shot of tequila
Step 4: your drunk
Sorry I got completely naked in your bed, but I feel our friendship has grown because of it.
And the prospective student I was showing around had to take care of me.
I wish there was a morning after pill for dominoes.
Randomize
