Should I text him? Life is confusing when you actually like someone instead of just wanting to blow them.
the way she shouted out instructions during sex made me feel like I was having sex with my gym teacher
A guy with no shirt on and a eyepatch just got out of the car beside me. After he slammed his door into mine. This is our hometown.
Ryab! Make hr wtop. Mshe make sme speee. I don want to pee. I want sev. He was so igbad. Redpo.
Like, I just want to be naked rolling around in soft things.
I can't believe he let me cut his hair as stoned as I was.. I think I even cut my own hair too
He ran around the party with a broken foot/ankle with a gallon of Malibu yelling "it must rain coconut"
My trash can accurately represents my weekend: Bojangles wrappers and magnums.
I'm questioning my decision to swallow this morning while my stomach was in hangover mode
I never thought I'd say this but there's too many dicks around here.
I made it 1 week... 5 business days at my new job before sleeping with my coworker.
Congrats you've received dick pics from an Olympic silver medalist
She woke up next me in bed and told me to stop driving so fast.
Wait. How did I get engaged last night?
According to the rule of quantum porn mechanics, the mere thought of something kinky causes it to exist. So out there, somewhere, there is already riddler/smurf porn...
Randomize
