theres no cameras in the kitchen right? cause i dont wana get fired for peeing in the kitchen in a cup
he took off his pants and apologized in advance if I thought he was too small.
Just saw a denim jacket with the phrase christian cowboy...ridin with the lord under a picture of a cowboy in a sunset. I'm def in mississippi.
so I woke up without pants, but my cardigan was still on and fully buttoned. curious.
I told him I'd rather have sex with his father last night. I'll admit now that I was drunk.
disregard all texts ive sent you minus taco motherfucking bell
Don't try to dry clothes in the microwave. They'll catch on fire.
If you're fucking that other dude, I'll take the sloppy seconds. I don't care.
One good thing about being a mom now, I can tell which guys I'm dating were breastfed and which weren't... By the way they latch on to my breast during sex! Kinda kills the mood.
Find me a date. With a beard. I want him to rub his beard on my tits. I'm not even into that stuff but I think it'd be so warm.
I need to beat up a magician now. BRB.
I hate that I still want him to look at me as the vagina that got away.
I just wanna know if were done hooking up so I know of that condom he left in my top drawer is fair game
AMAZON SELLS SEX SWINGS!
Tomorrow's lesson plan is going to be on hangovers and why drinking during the week is never a good idea. I hope my boss approves.
Randomize
