is it bad that listening to the rabbi's wife talk about how we should only be with one person is making me really, really horny for no string attached sex
This girl just stopped in the middle of a sentence because of my blue eyes. She said she got lost in them. I am laying pipe tonight.
He tried to say the picture wasn't him. Like I'd forget his curved boner.
Divorce is final. Doing tequila shots at 1 in the afternoon.
I'm sorry I drunk dialed you before realizing that you were already in bed with me.
i accidenteley seduced the christian girl's brother so i dont think we can count on free church picnic food again
Sleeping in a car was not on my list of plans for the night.
and if planning a fake elopement keeps me from fucking strangers and doing drugs, i think it's good for me
We are all yelling at the cat at our apt in nothing but our underwear. How do you think it's going.
2015 is a year for health and mental stability and alas we are not yet there so yolo
He called his dick "The Beast" and said he lived "The Beast Life". He was pretty but it was better if he didn't talk.
a guy offered me a piece of pizza if I'd make out with a random girl. We got the whole damn box and I ain't even mad
You need to finger her with the Spock hand sign since she loves Star Trek.
i told them you weren't like that.. and they laughed at me?
I am not a whore. I just wanted casual drinking, monogamous sex and occasional McDonald's runs.
Randomize
