End of the semester and I banged 14 freshman. I'm like my own welcome to college orientation guide.
Why would he get rid of a girl with no gag reflex? I don't get it.
Lowest moment of my life just occurred. I literally threw up all over myself in front of my parents.
When were having sex he was mumbling some guys name. If he wasn't as hot as he is I'd be concerned.
Do you think if I puke at the gym they think is because I'm going hard walking on the treadmill?
Are you available to help carry me into the house Monday?
Btw before you ask, the dr said there's no way shoving his dick that far down my throat is why i got laryngitis
I was expecting it to be of the "I am your vagina's reckoning" caliber.
Just a heads up... Don't get high and attempt to do your own taxes
I'm resourceful. I forgot we don't have coca cola so now I'm drinking Jack & Dew or Mountain Daniels. Also, I haven't decided on an official name yet for this drink. I'm leaning toward Jack & Dew
She's going to be the first to die of too much illness. Not even super bad stuff like cancer but like for having a cold at the same time as a sore throat and chlamydia or something. Just too much diseases.
I walked out in my coconut bra, and that's when it all went downhill.
Girl. There is no more toilet paper. You should have seen the twerking I just did to shake the pee off.
I woke up with my converse still on and a plate of pasta next to my face, if that gives you any indication of how my night went
I jerked off 12 hours ago exactly. I owe it to my penis to get laid.
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