loyola was giving a tour this morning and they all saw me in a half ripped off toga throwing up over the side of the dorm stairs
you don't even go to loyola anymore
I was wasted and lost so I called the cops and asked for directions. It seemed logical at the time
Literally just as i started to cum the church bells next ot my house began to ring. either it was the most epic timing ever or god was watching and congratulating me
I don't really want to write this paper. It's the last one of the semester - I need to savor the feeling of procrastination.
i just stepped in cum. i hate you.
Thats what happens when you don't swallow.
there should be laws that require people like to me to be on birth control.
About to fuck some random fraternity guy I met at a party. I guess this would be the right time to say I don't want to be with you anymore.
he put $150 on the cabs dash so 9 of us could pile in and ride 3 blocks to the apartment.
One of two things would happen: He'd love it, or you'd get a restraining order.
Eating this pizza pocket is like eating out god
Think I can pull off edward 40 hands before class?
You might end up in the wrong class.
I'm a COM major, they're all the wrong class.
There is a glee sing along. It's on random and they know them all. Like, the specific glee timings and pauses. I need to leave. I need to escape
At tuba camp, the pickings are slim. It's like being the tallest midget.
CRAIGSLIST IS NOT THE ANSWER
IM LONELY AND HORNY
If this adventure is going to get us arrested it'll have to wait until Wednesday so that I can bail myself out.
Randomize
