puking up blue gatorade is not as nearly as much fun as it sounds
Just bought a german beer stein with tuition cash. no regrets
Last night she showed me how to clean my bowl and now she's drunk making peanut butter filled cookies. Best. Roommate. Ever.
I wasnt that drunk. Throwing the table off the third story was totally logical.
you smelled like vodka, i think that's why my grandma liked you
Woke to a half burnt 20 in my pocket, covered in mud, clothes all wet, so im assuming I didn't use that 20 you gave me for a taxi
Reached a new low. Drinking Wine from my thermos while on the stair master.
I woke up this morning with a wristband and I thought I went to the hospital last night I actually went ice skating instead
Stop leaving me alone with my ex boyfriends after keg challenges. Woke up in his bed covered in what you think would be cum. No...toothpaste. He left a note. "Be home at four. Don't be here when I get back."
I feel that the drunker I get, the drunker Facebook gets.
Bitch, it's 2 in the afternoon.
He sent me a vid of himself jerking off. I hope his hands are the size of tennis rackets or it will be a very short date.
im in the post action - pre consequence stage.
Cheez-its and a bottle of cab...for under $10 you could win this girls heart
all night she kept rolling over and mumbling something about wanting an extendable retractable urethra.
You have such a talent for this
Friendship, or finding weed?
Yes
Randomize
