He shit in the bushes next to the pool at the Venetian, after throwing up in the hallway. You really can do anything in Vegas.
I negotiated the purchase of an entire tray of like 50 jello shots for $8.
Feels weird sitting between two guys who've had their heads between my legs in a 24 hour span.
I just asked the contractor building my house what it would cost to put a garbage disposal in all the shower drains...there was a lot of judging going on.
i think that dennys waitress has my boxers
She gives pretty bad head, but when it's in her dad's Lexus SUV it's tough to complain.
I hate when people see you passed out in your front yard and call 911. Like what, you can't take a nap face down on your steps at 4pm?
You almost set me on fire last night.
You probably deserved it.
Cops on bikes. I think I can outrun them.
Idk, you were a drunk pirate that kept stealing pieces of people's costumes to keep as your booty.
That would explain all the random shit in my room...
Had sex with him again...yikes. and the whole time he kept saying "i wish we could do this forever." Forever lasted about 45 seconds
it is a dangerous dangerous place where morals and dignity go to die and all your fantasies about men become reality.
I shoulda been born a dude. There's too much power in a vagina.
we should start a freak-out-the-cashier-contest. I just bought JerseyShore Season2, red high heels, and nipple soothing pads
Don't come up here. Strippers r crying.
Randomize
