Just saw remains of her puke from last night on my pants.... thats got "Apology BJ" written all over it.
I wonder what gingers are like in bed...as awkward as their hair or just as unique as it...?
Your TV has the DVD menu for White Chicks permanently burned into the screen. I can't anymore. That's just a whole different level that I cannot comprehend.
I wish I could just thrust my cock straight into her new relationship.
Being at this bar with grandma is a real cockblocker
He said his penis was a 1 woman penis with a conscience an I was that woman...technically a declaration of commitment rite?
I'm going to a foam party and gonna grind someones dick off hayy
Do me a favor? If you get with him, please lick his abs. Someone has too they're just too beautiful not to.
The drag queen we did coke with is going to be on Ru Paul's drag race. I feel so proud.
Just fyi there is a naked girl somewhere in your house. I woke up and she was gone, definitely left her clothes tho
We work out, have really intense sex, and then eat cereal marketed for children. We have a system, okay?
I couldn't find the oven mitts so I used a thick stack of tortillas
Like he was trying to be sexy but he had shit taste in porn so i left
Micheal let me call him captain america while we fucked. It was awesome
Nothing is more confusing than dreaming about being chased by jets, then waking up with an erection.
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