please tell me I'm in your upstairs bedroom. Just google mapped myself and I have no idea where I am.
Everytime she would start slurring, she'd stop, hold up a finger, wait like 30 seconds, then try again. I love drunk people
sorry about calling you the devil all night.
You pointed at his crotch then made a thrusting motion. I think it's safe to say every guy at my college loves you.
Motor boating, judging by the amount of lipstick I found I would say between 6 to 8 times
dude all you wanted to do was sleep under a bridge
found used condoms and an omlet in my uggs. I'm disgusted but not surprised.
Of course the bar would go completely silent right as I yell out "I don't have AIDS"
You stole a fry from a complete stranger. He wasn't happy. Then you said fuck it and stole the whole poutine and ran down the street while he stared in shock.
I'm the one on the patio wearing underwear. Holding a pipe. Pigtail and glasses. Can't miss me.
because of daylight savings time I lost an hour of sex with an incredibly hot guy last night. thanks a lot farmers.
Last night was incredible. I can tell by the nacho cheese on my jacket
Nxt time we drink that much, we'll have to hide the crayons. Crayola-ing a mural on the living room wall wasnt the brightest idea, but it sure is classy. Right?
i have a serious question for you... Why I am i not wearing any pants?
I knew she was the one when we had sex to the halo soundtrack.
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