don't worry. When rigor sets in, we'll make sure to get you laid one last time.
Well, what part of "I've heard she has crabs" didn't you take into consideration?
im sitting in my room wearing my power rangers shirt watching a movie about a magical dragon. Ive totally forgotten what having a sex life is like.
Theres a disney princess moonbounce on karen st. and I'm drinking beer at a little league field. this might end with me in jail.
Once again there IS no outside bathroom. Never has been, that is the balcony
I should have but it might be too early in this fuckbuddyship to emasculate him
All I remember is apologizing to his sister for being a bad influence while I was throwing up into a big gulp cup.
When the cab driver starts laughing its a good indication of the standard of girls you are bringing home
So when this rash is gone wanna hang out?
MY GOD DAMN TV STOPS WORKING EVERY TIME I AM THIS FUCKING HIGH. WHY MUST IT TORMENT ME?!
Update: I spent 10 minutes trying to fish out a rogue vagina weight.
I should have known when she said it would be "fun" we'd end up in the hospital
I told the border patrol officer she was smuggling drugs in her ass. I doubt she cheats on me again.
If he doesn’t slap your ass with his drumsticks, then I don’t wanna hear about it.
If I slept with her my dick would come out glittery
coward.
Randomize
