You're my little dorito
Who wears a wallet chain?!
Where you at
assisting at a photo shoot in williamsburg till 7ish. wassup?
Doesn't matter. I already jerked off in your bed.
She does have a great personality.
Yeah, in her vagina.
Is it illegal to masterbate in an airport?
It's spring break, I'm sure it's ok.
Great. Me and the intoxalock guy are getting so close he just said "alright see you later girl!" when I called about getting the blower recallibrated.
the "its better than getting an actual virus from an actual porn star" argument failed.
just when i thought i had forgotten how badthe sex was he comes across campus solely to say hi
He's coming over, and I hope he doesn't get hungry. I'm sure its not proper protocol to bring one booty call to another booty call's house for the munchies.
Bunch of Navy warships just sailed into New York Harbor for Fleet Week. Nobodys getting laid this weekend.
I'm not gay but if a lesbian wants to eat my box out I'm not gonna say no to someone who knows what they're doing.
Do you think I could get someone from tinder to drive me to the airport?
I gave him morning sex, a bag of cookies, and dropped him off at work. I believe I deserve the "best hookup award."
Update - might be back in your neighbor's good graces. She liked the framed photo I gave her of me on the tractor with my business out.
Visions of polite missionary are dancing in my head right now kinda and it alarms me
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