no more hot dogs for you........
fine no more vajj for you
No jewlry, no bra, and no pen. I couldnt be more prepared for a friday morning class.
yeah my parents were only ten feet away and we somehow managed to do it in five different positions without them noticing
I told you I was good to drive
dumbass I drove... you sat in the passengers seat and steered with a paper plate
It doesn't matter if I tell the story beginning to end or end to beginning, the story still starts with a random girl blowing me in the bathroom.
I am literally hand feeding my crying ex boyfriend taco bell. What has my life become?
I may be Daddy's little princess, but doesn't mean I can't be the blowjob queen.
If you're fucking that other dude, I'll take the sloppy seconds. I don't care.
well one of us has to be wrong and it's not going to be me
My Dicks been hard all day. Poor guy isn't used to vacation being over
I have a story for you. It involves waffles and getting naked with the local weatherman.
Your grandma changed her Netflix password :(
HE PUT A HOLE. IN. MY. HOUSE!!!
He's my blizzard buddy. We're blowing lines and doing a 3D game of thrones puzzle
I just racked up a fucking ginormous hospital bill because I came so hard I had an asthma attack
Randomize
