Her gag reflex was as absent as a father figure must have been in her childhood
Her eyes are really red like she jus got out of the hospital and shes coughing ...80 ppl at her school do have swine flu dude
So your saying just a blow job?
I hate it when hot girls behave. It's so anticlimactic
I'm thinking we should try to start remembering stuff we do. Althought I kinda like feeling like Nancy Drew the next morning.
More like the Hardy Boys cause its kinda like a team effort.
So this shipmate of mine somehow managed to throw up in his back pocket.
I just took my friends on a tour of all the places I've had sex in my house. I dont know if that's more slutty, or the fact that it took 2 hours to complete..
Okay my swimming class is like the fatass/diabetic guide to losing 2 pounds by christmas
The bartender just started bringing me gin and tonic in a pint glass to save himself trips...
How bad does the situation have to be before its ok to attempt 'catastrophic event sex'?
Only I could run tino my father in law while looking at condoms at Rite Aid. At 730 on a Thursday morning. I'm in trouble.
How high are you?
I feel like breakfast can just fly into my mouth
When I was leaving this morning he gave me some candy off his floor to prove he was a nice guy... He definitely knows the way to my heart. Best one night stand ever
Googled 'how drunk am I' and it was NOT helpful
I may or may not have spiked my gatorade to get through a game of monopoly with these children.
Hello! Time means nothing. Good morning! I have a vague idea of what day it is.
It is Muednethiday, March 34th, in the Year of Our Lord Joe Exotic 3099.
Randomize
