Any of you guys fuck a 16 year old again? Because our front yard got fucked over high school style.
Your mom has a birthmark right next to her nipple
it's like iHOP with fire
dude im at a party with a bunch of 17 year old gilrs this is awesome
no its not leave
i may have reached my "but im high so it's cool" quota for the month.
He hid IN a snowbank for 2 hours waiting for me to come home. This game has to stop before someone dies.
Just painted my nails at the bar... I may be getting too comfortable here.
I rolled joints beforehand. Lit a candle. Ghetto rigged taping the 40's on my hands and then lit the joint using the flame of the candle.
I'm so proud of your modern ingenuity
He is dating a girl who is on the Olympic shooting team...I've never been so scared to hit on a guy with a girlfriend in my entire life.
There is pretty much a target on everyone's lips when I am drunk. EVERYONE
i need to start buying Plan B in bulk and leaving them at the door. I'm really sick of walking to CVS with my one-nighters
I'm sorry if you weren't drunk enough to be peer pressured into the naked dancing/group make out that transpired last night
Rob and I are cross faded and the only one taking care of us is a drunk person who's making us dance.
If I could steal your goatee and hide it under my bed to keep your from wearing it, I would.
hes sooooo boring!!! I feel like I’m in a relationship with myself now. I have an 8 inch dildo under my bed, THATS how much I’m in a relationship with myself.
Randomize
