he looked about as manly as a guy in a volkswagen bug can look
I may have pooped in your shoe. or somewhere else in your closet. its unclear.
I owe you 20 bucks. My blood work did show liver damage.
It's times like this I miss having my nipples pinched
Anxiously awaiting my period drinking Hershey's syrup from the bottle. Don't judge me
that was THE gayest party i've ever been to
To be fair, the theme was Cabaret. I don't know what you were expecting.
It takes a special kind of man to fart REALLY loudly right before entering a woman and still get some. This has been a state of bootytown address.
Thanks for the Beyonce article. In other news, I just passed a man with the state of Florida tattooed on his face.
But there's never enough margarita money.
This is going to be one of those situations where we lose a day, isn't it
I don't know. Sometimes you can be a wild card with your emotions. Mostly the emotion known as anger.
I basically have the attention span of a ferret on meth when it comes to men
this is an emotional support booty call
I think he's like Cher he's going to live forever but not as scary looking
It's only 10am and I doubt my day could get much worse. During my 9am meeting I had to sit between my boss who I fucked for my promotion and the guy he walked in on me fucking on the copier
It was like a single vaginal boat in a sea of one eyed monsters
Randomize
