Will you still be my friend if I read and enjoyed Twilight?
No
the way i see it him paying 500 bucks for my fake abortion is karma's way of punishing him for cheating on his wife
Give me the approximate price and I'll give you the equivalence in blowjobs.
drunk guy next to me on the train just tried to share his pizza with me
he just tried to feed it to me...i love new york
I'm watching him slurp a whole mango out of her hand. It's disturbingly arousing.
Heb just said, and I quote, "let's go to Who's On Third and fuck a fishbowl with our mouths. I am going to fuck this van." and then he humped a van.
This is my gift to your gina
Hooking up with him was lovely.. but waking up in his bed the next morning and finding double stuffed oreos... I mean.... I won
i’m blowing bubbles in my bloody mary so yeah it’s pretty much time to go
Adderall went through the wash. Took it anyway. Wish me luck.
Can you explain to me why I showed my boobs to the firemen to get free beer?
don't worry dude i have your phone, text me when youre gonna come get it
the guy had "bad bitches only" tattooed above his penis...
we found her. shes in the bathtub full of raw pasta. i dont even know...
This whole brainwashing thing is easy!
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