I sat a few seats down and one row behind a cute girl at the Cubs game today. Having watched her talk to the guy next to her, I found out only her name and age. I then used that information and pieced it together with over 500 girls on Facebook with the same name. I found the same girl, and we're now fbook friends.
if being a creepy fuck was an olympic sport, they'd think you were using performance enhancing drugs...
You tired to make Beefaroni in the Mr. Coffee machine.
I found those 18 whoppers we bought.
Well if it makes you feel any better I threw up at Roadhouse. And then on the way to the train. And then in a water fountain. And then in a plastic bag on the train.
Sex with him was like teaching a two year old how to work a machine gun
Then mom squeezed my boob and said, "Dad would go nuts if I had these..."
Well we're either getting a bunny or I'm getting you pregnant in about 12 days.
I AM CRUING IT IS 93:2 AM AND I AM CYGIN INT BED
I'm still me, I just happen to have things in my porn library that you may not have expected
Only you would come out as bi like that
TOPLESS DRIVE THRU! I have no money and my dignity is at an all time low.
Hes done the math! Hes calculated how much sex it's going to take to fuck 365 miles. Now thats a little brother im proud of. New resolutions are a go!
Im not sure if the cops that just came are strippers or actually cops
He's hot....knda sweaty, drunk smells like feet....but he's hung like a whale....so in other words totally your type
Just had to read the instructions to my microwave. How am I so high?
So I took a screenshot of my boarding pass and the TSA agent somehow swiped it to the next photo. Yep...TSA saw my dick before I even went through the body scanner.
Randomize
