Whiskey dick.
Yea dude! Love it. Hate it. Have it.
Everyday of my life.
You know, sometimes I seriously doubt your commitment to sparkle motion.
I'm not high anymore, I decide when it's done.
ugh. people who use coupons make me wanna punch a baby.
I'd steal beers with my tail. If I were a monkey.
I want to see you in more than a weed delivering capacity
oh yea it is. i was not expecting to look at a snowbank and just see flying mushrooms
yes he does come on. what guy wouldnt want his penis named after a dragon
constantly striving to make life awkward and more complicated, one drunk bone at a time.
I don't know what I wash first. My body or my puke painted car. People are judging me as I drive by.
So... Apparently, "Home" isn't the correct response when a cop asks for your address...
Well, you were never considered a shining example of sobriety anyway
How much of a thot would I be if I put this pic up? On a scale of thot-ish to Queen of Thotlandia
Dude I can't beleive you didn't wake up. I literally f'd her IN THE DISHWASHER. Btw I'm pretty sure I also kinda broke the dishwasher.
I just found an old slice of LIME in my wallet?????????
Randomize
