Well apparently he's into motor boating.
The jonas brothers playing in your laptop. This is why guys won't sleep with you...
I think I'd remember a dick in my mouth
Ok I might come if this chair quits being so great...I'm also seeing this bush in the corner turn into a witch
Wedding update: no alcohol, 75% of people have left, no one is dancing, no single groomsmen, and it's 5:30. I'm going the fuck home to drink by myself.
I will be naked everywhere
i'm gonna fuck his crew, i'm gonna wax my asshole. i'm gonna make them all cry tears of sex joy then move to colorado.
Seriously though, you almost tore my right nipple off.
My unemployment came through so I'd like to thank the taxpayers of Utah in advance for my level of intoxication this weekend
Apparently this is my life now. Fucking men in their 30s with small dogs.
I woke up to see that I had ripped my boxers into a loin cloth because we were watching last of the mohicans
Sure. But we have to be quiet.
Ninja mode activated
him and the cab driver we buy e from got into a fist fight, about which show is better, futurama or family guy.
I'm actually pretty sure the amount of alcohol I drank last night erased memories from other times in my life.
So, I found your eyebrow, someone glued it in between my eyebrows so I looked like I had a unibrow when I went to work...
Randomize
