How, after 24 years of life, did I manage to revisit breastmilk
Note to all middle aged "I totally let myself go after childbirth" frumpy mothers: I do not dress this way for your husbands. Stop looking at me like that. It's not my fault.
In a bar in glasgow talking to a 12 year old about life. Welcome to Kentucky.
Just heard her singing at the school concert... I am honored my penis was touched by those pipes
I woke up because I was nodding to the dream question of "would you like a sombrero?"
It's like....nice talking about real estate but your son gave me herpes
According to FB I fucked in a field 365 days ago.
I wish you would stop telling everyone that your cock turned me into a Bears fan.
I realized last night, I never talk dirty in German during sex. How much wasted potential is that?
And then we can spend New Year's Day sprawled across the tiles watching greys anatomy and puking into the bushes over the balcony. It'll be great
You gave your boss a bj to get the safe employee of the month award?
My kids are NEVER playing in the park more than 2 feet away from me until they are capable of punching an eagle.
classified somewhere between kinky and medically inadvisable
FYI there's a girl here with happy daddy written on her tits
Is there a way to use porn to inspire him to have dirty thoughts? Like the movie Inception except with more lube and orgams?
Randomize
