Bea Arthur died yesterday
You shut your stupid mouth
Betty White is next, I just know it.
Betty White will never die! She's like Dick Clark. Rue McCalahan is next.
if she leaves who will i have to secretly talk about behind thier back
The boys are giving me the exam answers and I don't even have to expose my body..yayy engineering!
My friend is getting herself a tramp stamp that says "property of the half blood prince".
We need to talk about our relationship.
I just won a bet involving 10 tequila shots. You've got about 3 minutes
Dude turns out her best friend is lesbian...there is no wingman for this situation
My google history shows every combination of "red lobster cheesy biscuits" possible.
And then somehow we were arguing over how to fold our arms
I don't know what's worse the the fact he has worn a protective cup for last 3 years in fear of being kicked in the balls. Or the fact that the one day he decides to throw caution to the wind and doesn't wear it and actually gets kicked in the balls.
Who in tha hell do u hang out with?
This is the Taco Bell dump we've all been waiting for.
Can you stop being a bitch and just take some Kaluha shots with me bro?!?
Thanks for letting me pee on your bed and cry about nothing to you. You're a real friend
I’m home.
I’m aware. I just dropped you off.
false alarm, still single
Blunts beyotch
What? Joints? Blunts?
I'll refer you to my previous text: "Blunts beyotch"
Randomize
