You really coming over, don't trick.
We sat in your minivan all night in a parking lot pretending we were in the magic school bus going to the sun
when we were having sex and i started crying and telling you i missed you..why couldnt you stop and tell me how you felt or make me feel better?you kept going...
my vagina's been through so much this weekend
you mean so much has been through your vagina this weekend?
im gonna put my furry chinchilla vagina on her mother effing nose
the can pyramid on my head actually reached a decent height before I moved.
I drunk madeout with my mom last night. it's guna be an awkward breakfast.
Its really bad when you fall asleep at a stop light outside the hotel and you wake up to a small spanish limo driver knocking on your window to tell you it's a green light
you're my knight in shining pee-resistant armor
i should do something illegal before my birthday. as of thursday im old enough to go to jail.
Well sundance is in town and Im going to use my one and only shot to bang Taylor swift... Does it count as a random if shes famous?
What can I say? I like my food like I like my women, not entirely fucked by our contemporary world.
let’s face it, me joining a co-ed soccer league is like, 33% motivated by my crotch seeking a healthy outlet
I despise everything about her. Except her tits.
He’s perfect! He listens to Genesis during sex and has a VW bus!
You really are from the panhandle, aren’t you?
Randomize
