Is it necrophilia if we're both dead?
walkin around the woods blazed, drawing pictures of trees and plants, i get a grade for this
he yelled "RELEASE THE KRAKEN" then hit me with his dick
I just turned in a 4 page paper spelling absolute as "absolut" every single time. I'm an alcoholic
Then she opened the door and pitched the dead squirrel out, yelling "TELL THE OTHERS WHAT YOU SAW"
walmarts paint section shouldnt be open at 3am
The bartender gave me a roll of masking tape so I could tape my heels to my feet so I wouldn't lose them when i went drunk running later that night
The guy in the American Flag bikini was telling the women he was disgusted at the amount of alcohol they weren't drinking. Then it got ridiculous.
Ok I'm good with that cause I'm gonna disappear for 90 days
Are you goin to rehab again?
I take it we used my cleavage as a pen holder last night during the graffiti party. Looks like the colours of Crayola exploded all over my chest
Just told my mom I need money for Molly. She was not happy
I don't know how it happened. All I did was tell her I was impressed by her presentation. Her nail marks on my back ain't going away anytime soon.
I've pulled 4 ticks off of me. This is the last time I suck dick in the wild.
I found a used condom in my purse this morning. It was in there with a bunch of smushed french fries.
Jack and I got in a huge fight at 6am. He fell asleep when I was giving him head so I freaked. We were both black out so I made a memo in my phone reminding me
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