ok shes still asleep, should i pee on her and say she did it herself? and by the time you respond to this ill probably have already made the decision
Its already bleeding so dont be alarmed after you bite it
He looked way older than 15. He probably thought that since I have braces I was 15. Fuck. The 6 year age gap is never to be spoken about. Especially because what happened constitutes as illegal.
of course. lets lasso hookers.
Funny how often beer equates to second degree burns on some portion of my body.
we flagged you as soon as you tried to put the lime in the microwave to prove it was really a kiwi. again.
In hindsight, buying 4 different kinds of vibrators at once may have been a little overenthusiastic of me.
I was stumbling so much, men walking behind us were shouting "don't hit the pole! don't hit the pole!" whenever I was near a telephone pole.
Ummm didn't i have pubes when i went to bed last night?
And if I don't get arrested for drinking and canoeing over the next 3 days, this hurricane will not have turned out anywhere near as well as I planned
So much for doing Irish car bombs in my grandpa's memory.... Asshole.
He also complimented my butt. High praise coming from a boob guy.
I'm glad there seems to be a general consensus regarding your ass
Haha, how do I word that nicely? "You got me to the edge of no return twice and failed to let me orgasm, therefore you owe me chicken nuggets or hot wings. Your decision"
Hooray! My email address wasn't leaked by Ashley Madison!
I will chop off your penis
I want a dick in my left hand and a Crunch Wrap Supreme in my right hand.
Randomize
