Thanks for last night it was amazing as always
What are you talking about
You've got to be kidding me
they thought it would be fun to get out their yearbook and see who hooked up with the most guys..I won...I don't even go to the same school
Best friends brother. Beat that.
Putting the hydrocodone in Pez dispensers. Do you want Speedy Gonzales or Darth Vader?
So last week was the 4th time a girl cried after sex. I'm seriously doing something wrong
Im drinking a large pickle jar full of Emergency, water and left over pickle juice and I dont care.
I'm now at that point where it just feels natural to do a few shots of whisky with breakfast and then head to work
Its fiiine, tuesday is like the thursday of wine wednesday. And i mean, free beer for girls at the grove...im not NOT gonna take that offer up!
Look at your life. Look at your choices.
I'm allowing myself one mistake a year. He gets to be 2012.
He wouldn't let me leave his house until he made me orgasm once for every year I've been alive. The birthday sex song did not prepare me for this.
While randomly hooking up with my neighbor last night he says "it's okay we're neighbors".
The three of us were sitting silently in my dining room at 4:30 am, half drunk, eating cold spaghetti and listining to death metal. I need a fucking cigarette.
it'll be okay! And just think of this ultrasound as the most action you've had in a month...
He is saved in her phone as Sir. Mindfuck <3/ vag cleaner of course I need to meet him.
I feel like i'm being yelled at when you type in all caps.Did you just have bad sex?
Randomize
