we went to that german restaurant and drank out of the boots. Then I threw up into one
So I had sex with him again. He's still got it. Not chlamydia, he got rid of that.
her bf's celebrating 10 yrs of service at kfc...it's safe to say all the good men are taken
It would be celebrated in history as "the orgasm heard round the world"
other than her wanting kids and me wanting to do drugs,were perfect for each other
once you get past the part where you think youre gonna die, its the most amazing drug ive ever experienced.
i decided what we are doing for your 21st b-day: camelbacks filled with margaritas
Confirmed. Vegetarians give terrible head.
she got kicked out of the bar for shoving german chocolate cake in the bartenders face. we were there less than a minute
In his defense he just bought a bong like a week ago so he's still in that honeymoon phase.
I wrote "fuck you meg" on my toaster strudel with the icing. I call it "passive aggressive breakfast"
my friend was passed out in the bathroom so I threw up in the coffee maker, not the pot the water reservoir that kind of drunk.
I'm so drunk and angry about the Michigan game the fact of my relationship being over doesn't matter
I tied him up for his boyfriend so he could get fisted... I'm the best roommate ever.
Wow. That's certainly more than I've ever done for a roommate.
That’s all I need in life: vibrators, butt plugs, strawberry lube, and sour gummies
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