This morning when you woke up you looked like one of the Wii Bowling people. I think it was the eyebrows combined with the sambuca
Now that the olympics are over we have no excuse for getting belligerently drunk for nationalism every night.
I've hooked up with six guys in my ethics class next semester...I feel like I've failed already
I think I found an E pill under the couch.. Or really bad tasting candy. Check back in 30min this could get exciting
So i forgot that my head is completely wrapped in gauze, and tried to do the "come hither" look. He think's i'm brain damaged
I want to do something romantic. Like gargle champagne before I put your dick in my mouth.
I think you're going to have to drive me to white haven. I don't know if my brain can handle having my mom drop me off at a strip club.
We had a pillow fight. It looks like an angel exploded here. A DRUNK ALCOHOLIC ANGEL
I was looking at our sex bingo and pretty much every single row or column has at least one kind of person that is harder to find than all the rest
We've made things harder for ourselves
The struggle will be part of the fun
Haha it's harder than you'd think to come up with ways to turn your penis into a Christmas drawing
we had a full conversation and he only brought up drugs twice. overall I'd call it a success
Like pizza and mermaids make up about 1/3 of my thoughts on the weekends.
I would fuck him just for his dog
she chased shots of jack with a fucking steak. i'm in love.
Looks like the opera singer hook up is paying off. Ran into the MILF from 407 and she said “your lady friend sounded like a very lucky girl.”
Randomize
