My parents just checked my browsing history and now think I'm addicted to porn and am a necrophiliac. 1: I know it was you. 2: You're so dumped, that shit is sick.
Sam from lord of the rings is 10 yards away from me, i am creaming myself.
Well, I'm eating cake, watching wedding videos of people I don't know, and crying. Clearly I'm a vision of mental health today
It was also my first failed attempt at shower sex.
Ok not good, my info has definitely been submitted to this sugar daddy website before.
Exactly. Motivated vaginas are the best kind of vagina
He purred while eating me out. HE PURRED AND I LIKED IT.
The guy who bit me so hard two nights ago that I had to put Neosporin on my nipple and the guy in my bed right now are two different people. Help
Shotgunning beers to finish a midterm project at 3am is a good idea right?
I asked him if he wanted a pillow, and he replied "No. Batman never had pillows."
I seriously doubt I'm gonna be able to properly put your dick in my mouth whilst upside down, but I'm willing to give it my best shot
If I just skip sleeping, does hangover still happen? Gonna try it. Will report back. StTAND BY
You pretty much lost your mind. Your ego has gotten ten time the size of your balls.
you should never start the day with a boob text. It can only go downhill from there
We go out and drink, fuck, and I stay the night. He agrees to it because he knows I'll hook him up to IV fluids in the morning. Everyone wins
Randomize
