piano lessons. No girlfriend. What's up.
The iPad is going to make my porn collection SO much more glossier... thanks steve jobs.
I feel wrong giving my mom a cash gift full of dirty stripper money.
There are lots of gay asians. This is better than i was expecting
i just remembered i chipped my tooth last night when i pulled up your pants zipper with my teeth
Imagine the time you most wanted to kill yourself. Now add a room full of jail bait and no booze. Multiply that by a million.
and honestly how many chances will you get to hook up with a one armed guy?
I just realized I'm trading you a pregnancy test for the morning after pill...
It's been a bad semester.
Matt's offering to breast feed it.
Is this the point in which we come to terms with our lesbianism or is that after you send me more ass pics...
Not sure how but he broke three of his fingers while giving a blowjob. How does someone that accident prone survive to adulthood?
Just remembered that I got laid thanks to my glow in the dark Batman belt buckle. Need to wear it more often.
Although the guy I'm messing around with just offered to let me be his rich brother's sugar baby
Masturbated while waiting for my face mask to dry, so it was a productive night.
I know this shouldnt be a problem, but there are too many women hitting on me. I dont know what to do
Randomize
