He was so confused why there was a string hanging out of my vagina.
what day is it and did you see me today?
just realized the sink is the perfect height to piss into never cleaning the toilet again
make sure i look cute passed out on the couch.
I wonder if u can grow weed on Framville and sell it to Mafia Wars?
spring break forecast: sunny with a chance of shitshow
i don't want you to think of me as your TA
As I was brushing his cum out of my hair he looks at me and says "it happens to me all the time."
Just for the record its a bit awkward when you introduced me to your friends at your house as your brother and then insisted in front of them that I sleep in your bed with you
You gotta pick a side. My suggestion: side with tits.
Told some guy to hold your weave while you "tried" to kick his girlfriends ass...
Things are very odd on my 29th hour of being awake. Thought there was a bird in my lecture hall and it was just a girl putting up her hair. What even
The most adult decision I've mad today was Jameson or Fireball? It's been a successful Day
not that i'm not about exploiting men for money
I got a 93 percent on my last mid term and I was drunk. Think of the possibilities if i were sober for the one thats tommorrow.
Randomize
