His parents had a bottle of captain morgan on the table for me when I went for dinner. I feel accepted
all i remember is that her bootyshorts said 'shameless' and that there was no turning back.
we just plugged the camera up to the big screen. would you like to come see what you did last night, in high definition?
Definitely just puked in this corn maze. Families are staring.
Where the hell did all of these gingers come from? It's like they crawled out of their shame-caves for st Patrick's day.
Is it weird that the girl he dated after me had a child with him and it has my name? I think it means he's not over me. Or I'm really self absorbed...
The pool of urine in the trash can signifies both a regretful yet successful night.
Oh my god there's only so much masturbating one can do before one wants to fucking cry
I used to think not drinking while I was pregnant was not gonna be a problem, but I now I'm like shit that's a long time
you're right. a strip only looks good in porn . mine just looks like a fucked up mullet
I don't know if should be sitting on a toilet or kneeling in front of it
You had 10 drinks. On a first date.
I just masterbated then started bawling.
Sent him a snap chat of him eating me out so he can relive the moment.
Not going to lie: not even the fact I'm wearing men's cargo pants can hide the fact I have an awesome ass.
When I came out of the bathroom you were naked dead asleep on the couch but your dick was still rock hard standing straight up. I almost took a pic. It was impressive.
Standing straight up with intensity he came in his own mouth. I know this because he showed me the video from five different angles when asked if I would like him to demonstrate. And I did.
Randomize