I met a girl last nite that charged by the inch. i didnt have enough money but i figured shed be a good deal for u
Dude, this chick just tossed my salad hard. All that I could picture was a dog trying to get the last of the peanut butter out of the jar of Jiff and trying not to think of how grotesque my last dump was.
Then she tried to kiss me and I wouldn't and she got pissed off and went to sleep. Then about an hour later, her kid called her. She went home and on the way out I told her to wash her mouth before she kissed her kid good night. Weird night..
I'm worried someone is gonna take a black light to my work computer. But the connection is faster here.
so the time management class we had to take for work seems to be working. I just beat off instead of waiting for gf to get home bc it fit my schedule better.
she kept peeing on everything and yelling it was now her property.
She says I'm cute and I remind her of her brother. She's too hot to back out now. I don't know. I'm guna go for it.
I just found a tail you can wear naked. Via a butt plug. Who ever said the internet was a good thing?
one minute he's happily playing with a lighter and the next thing I know, he's screaming and the swing set is on fire
I dunno what's worse, the fact that I hooked up with a guy that shaves his armpits or that I didn't notice until he brought it up the next day
Well right but if we go, he may just disappear for a long time into the unknown with the drag queens.
at crossfit today a guy shit his pants while deadlifting 405 lbs. coach made fun of him then congratulated him on his new personal record.
I mean, I bought pot and shampoo before I ran out. I think I can adult.
She said I'm going to get you stoned and have you fuck me on the couch.
All I did today was eat pizza and use my vibrator.
You made me promise I wouldnt let you play "fuck fuck goose" with a 40 year old ever again.
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