So ps i'm not pregnant with any athletes illegitimate children : )
I should have kept drinking, a coma can't be as bad as this hangover
almost passed out on the way to class today.. laid down in a construction site. bad idea
Calling yourself a modern day Geisha doesn't justify being a whore.
Apparently I kept telling people I was a pro tennis player again...
He threw me out a window and then threw raw ground beef at us. Normally you'd hate someone for that, but that guy's great.
have i crossed some slutty boundary when gay guys are sending me cock pics?
so exactly what is concert sex etiquette? Before, during or after???
all of the above
ripping the fire alarm off the wall probably seemed like a better idea last night than it really was.
How do I know if porn I have watched is haunted?
I pulled a muscle last night drunk dirty snapchatting him
He's the only guy without a tacky accent I've seen in this southern dump in 6 months. Bangage was inevitable.
You're such a Yankee.
It's been 12 hours since I have heard from you and social media has given me no indication you are anything but dead, so that's what I'm going with.
Got home. Somebody tried to sell me weed on the street. I've never had to try so little to find a dealer before.
I just woke up in a prom dress on your bathroom floor, yea I'm 32.
Randomize
