Vomit. Vomit. Whatever. You wear a tiara in public.
he asked if thats how we do it in the states..like there's cultural difference in fucking between canada and the us..
Just found my mom passed out in my bed holding a bag of wine. Not sure if I'm ashamed or proud.
she's googling pictures of Freddy Mercury and whispering 'I'm ready'
And there I was, sitting Indian style on the kitchen floor, my fingers covered in peanut butter.
im about 40 per cent sure i invited the bouncer to our pajama party next weekend...
Who just wakes up in their own bed and assumes "I probably blew some guy last night"
She had one drink in her cleavage and another in her hand. She kept rotating between the two by leaning backward and then sipping the one in her hand.
Her stepmother interrupted our sex to tell her it was midnight and she wanted to do a sympathy shot for her 50th.
Don't break up.
All these girls I talk to are like I've never had a hangover and I'm like you don't drink right here let me show you
That bottle of wine took a part of my soul with it.
Yes, yes I will fake crap in his house for you.
Just threw up in the trash can at my desk. I guess "beating the hangover" eventually leads to this.
It's one of the few times I hit fuck it levels of not caring
I just met a drunk old lady with a bedazzled life alert alarm around her neck. I love casinos
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