we went to a bar last night, drank beer in plastic cups. I took pics w/a random kid i pulled into a photobooth & i have easy mac in my purse. I belong here.
My cousin just told me i smelled good. She must like the smell of cum.
whore
Sonogram pictures belong on a fucking fridge...NOT FACEBOOK!!
I don't know. I guess at the end of the day I wanted taco bell more than a boyfriend.
Totally get that.
the bartender cut you off himself after you started walking on tops of tables and hugging random people
Btw after this weekend the chipndales costume has a 125% success rate.
Your friend who drunkenly cleaned the kitchen just wished the class a Happy National Tutu Day. While wearing a tutu. Make a move or I'm gonna marry her.
I did, I'm just saying. Once the drinking starts my nipples are no longer my control.
I asked if he wanted to sext and he just started sending me pictures of his beard.
Apparently coming home smelling like I took a bath in beer is frowned upon in this household. I'm so glad I don't actually live here.
Soo I woke up in the storage room at best western....I dont even know what say
thanks again for a nice night (and please don't fuck my boss)
Woke up with a 22 year old with the number for a different girl written on my stomach, almost 30 can suck my dick I still got this shit
Should I apologize for the loud sex I had in his living room? Because I'm not going to.
Definitely not.
Just boned her on my desk. on top of my term paper. take that professor dipshit
Randomize
