so whats your words to drink to for the state of the union? mine are 'change' 'fight' and 'you know'.
mine is 'the'.
you kept shouting how the only tree you would hump is an elm tree because they're under populated
you handled that situation with as much grace as someone puking involuntarily could
I wouldn't take my shot so you poured it on my face. Twice.
Yes I hit her with my car. Yes I gave her a ride home. And yes she gave me her number. What's the problem?
Definitely sounds like it's time for some eggs with a side of strap on
Thats like me asking what you think of antisocial polish guys with mysterious rashes
There no better feeling of self control than stopping yourself before telling your girlfriend she gives head just like her sister.
He should know he can't successfully wrestle in pudding fully clothed. Amateur.
so apparently last weekend we taught the mascot how to shotgun beers. am i winning college yet?
DO NOT THROW SOUP AT YOUR SCREEN
I just watched a porn called gay of thrones and I think I've reached a new low in my life
Since I won't be making love with anyone on a bed of roses this year on Sunday I bought a Mustang to fill the gap
Hey so I got my period
Thank god I wasn't ready to deal with sober you for 9 months
You know what sucks about being drunk at 4 pm? Not a god damn thing.
Randomize
