somehow, due in part to drug cocktail and alchl prior to meeting, i blacked out, got home, made total mess of kitchen, broke shower, and made 17 hard boiled eggs
what if the hokey pokey really is what its all about?
just caught my little brother jacking off the family pet
I've drank myself into a smaller pants size. Who ever said alcoholism was unhealthy was mistaken.
she was so "full of love" from watching twilight that she came over and gave me a handjob. when does the next movie come out?
Doing "bucket stands" with buckets of margarita. Don't tell me it's not a good idea.
I wonder if that one guy remembers you sticking salami to his forehead when he was passed out on new years eve.
Yea there's blood all over the porch but we wont have to buy alcohol for the rest of the week
I've officially done it all, fucked a girl wearing a twister board. ABC parties are amazing!
Got home last night and found a Big Mac in the shower, tampons all over the place, and two pairs of your panties on the front porch.
it's finals week and we've been blasting country porch drinkin since 10AM. there's been like 4 tweets about hearin us on the other side of campus
I don't think I've ever been sadder than the way I feel when I finish my meal while I'm high
You were trust falling into bushes
i thought this was a perfectly normal conversation between two adult men about why this children's cartoon is quality television but no you just gotta be talking shit again
I danced shirtless on a platform with a fucking stripper who went to MIT
Randomize