ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
three words: i give head
three words: not that well
so...he totally just used scissors to cut up the weed. a wet paper towel to moisten the blunt....and a blow dryer so it wouldn't be wet. this dude either has the worst case of OCD or has the potential to be the next martha stewart.
And for your info. Don't pee outside with glow sticks. People will still see you.
So Ryan had to wash the dishes. His solution: take a shower with them. I'm never eating at his house again.
i love that you felt the need to clarify that you don't actually have drugs in your vagina.
and you're not allowed to put a penis in you if it's attached to a 26 year old who works at blockbuster
Just went outside to gather hail to use to make margaritas since we ran out of ice. That's God's way of helping us out.
My vagina would be awesome. I would be the most popular girl in the village.
#1 RULE OF DRINKING: DELETE YOUR EX'S NUMBER FROM YOUR PHONE
We kept trying to bring you to the hospital but you had a tantrum and kept saying you would never be Miss America
I crawled out his bedroom window, forgetting he lives in a split level and there is a 10 foot drop back there. I had to text him to come help me I twisted my ankle.
Fun Fact: I do not remember what its like to be sober between drinking off and on for two weeks at my "vacation" and being on painkillers for my mouth now
I had to hypnotize my roommate last night so there's that.
I just wish the first erections of my life didn't take place at a dentists office but hey whatever I turned out alright
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