You know how I told you I don't have many naked pics? Apparently that changed last night.
Is it a problem that I find my wife's 16 year old niece sexy?
I want to get so wasted that I make middle aged irish men look like mormon girls
Who was that couple sleeping in your bed with us last night?
This dude was wearing a "Plan B- One Step" backpack. I wonder how many more I have to buy until I get mine??
My friend and I just coined a new term. OBJ. The obligatory blow job. You totally know what I'm talking about.
Like if he goes down on you first, or you just don't want to bone him yet. OBJ.
I'll keep you from getting pregnant and you keep my papers gramaticallly correct
I can't believe he let me cut his hair as stoned as I was.. I think I even cut my own hair too
He wanted me to blow him while he did curls and looked at himself in the mirror. Not sure if gay or ego maniac.
HOW MANY BOYS NOT ONLY APPROVE OF YOUR PLAN TO BECOME POCAHONTAS, BUT WANT TO MAKE SURE YOU DO IT RIGHT? One, the answer is one, and he is the best and if anyone ever tries to steal him I can assure you they will never be heard from again
You declared your undying love to a drag queen, then proceeded to puke into the poor man's purse.
You can't break up with me. I brought you to see Beyoncé.
I just want to be like "i dont know you but ive seen your penis & i like it"
he put a condom on for a handjob WTF
I'm eating cold pizza from work and drinking beer from a wine glass trying to decide if I want to shower or just rub one out and go to sleep. How have I ever gotten laid?
Because you're really hot before taking the time to actually get to know you.
Randomize
