Dude, don't freak out but the girl who stuck the hair brush in her ass is here. I can't look her in the eye!!
Bro can a girl get pregnant if i jizz in her mouth?
hahahahahahahahahahaha
Tip #47, don't trim the bush when you have the shakes!
thats it. im googling how to make you boobs smaller. this is getting out of control.
there should be a rule- if you jizz on it, you wash it
He has jerked off in so many socks I am surprised he doesn't have athletes dick
I saw a chick at 8 am this morning walking back to my dorm wearing wings... I'm kind of jealous.
no, literally. he fb chatted me and said "since you're online i figured we could bang tonight?"
im drinking italian dressing and watching dexter. its 230am. lets never drink on sundays again.
mom just made me 'sorry-you-have-hpv-pancakes'
You called your ex's vag an "AIDS Pinata". Drunk You is the Hulk Hogan of insults.
I thought I was invisible, then some guy flashed his high beams at me and I realized my lights weren't on...not invisible.
I feel like we need a drunken piñata bash with your face being the piñata and my hopes and dreams being the stick
AND WHAT FELONIES DID I MISS OUT ON WHILE SLUMBERING!?
I imagine it like the scene in Sorceror's Stone, but instead of flying keys, it's flying dicks.
That is a dream.
Randomize
