Btw I've read that book you bought me...And I'm such a bitch now
But I don't think guys love me
You sent her a pic of your dick with 'guess what you cant have anymore' written on it with a marker.
I just saw the list where the U.S. doesn't even rank in the top 10 in drinking countries. I know its Tuesday but....its for America
Don't play hard to get, I've seen some of the girls you've slept with.
at what point did you see referring to the bartender as 'the white precious' a good idea??
Next time, showing us his dick should be his entry fee into your house.
I woke up in her bed, she woke up in mine. Apparently there was a miscommunication after the 8th jager bomb.
I dont care how drunk you were. Making a bet with MY husband at MY wedding that you could seal the deal before he could is ALWAYS inappropriate!
Am I really that girl who walks around half naked wearing a cowboy hat begging for liquor at some random guys house
From what I can tell at a cursory glance, it seems that last night I fell asleep on string cheese and it melted into my bra.
Apparently getting drunk at a philanthropy event and tweeting about it is "frowned up"
Question. Was fucking Laura an entirely regrettable decision?
like...quickly.
I gave a handjob to the beat of uptown fuck last night
Listening to The Little Mermaid soundtrack should cure my drunkeness right?
How's work going?
Boring. I have a cat on a leash right now
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