yes i saw that this morning. it was my mailbox.
Take your time, they're doing body shots off the dog.
His hands were made for my vagina.
open bar reception. dayglow. pray for me
Fixing to yell "you're too hot for her" at a Gerard butler look alike. There is absolutely no way this is going to end well...
Is it bad of me to apply as a night shift counselor at a boys orphanage purely because of how laid that would get me at bars?
He held the beaver pelt from the fireplace over my crotch and asked his friend "she look familiar now?", he then remembered my name.
We are not in a rock band. We can't continue living like this.
I also have to vacuum the broken noodles out of my suitcase...
Next time you see his dad you should let him know you are now Eskimo brothers.
Well I have rug burns in both armpits, somehow. So yes you should have been here
I mean in all honesty I would let James Franco shit on my chest. End of story
Crying on the toilet and taking a shit. This is what being an adult is about
Was just messaged by someone in a Power Ranger suit on OkCupid... Figured you would approve
Do you know how hard it is to put a bandaid on a vagina?
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