My mom foundout about my dui nd just called me to come home. I just took acid like 30 min ago. Wht should i do?
If my vag had twitter, what do you think it would say?
my mom just walked in on me furiously masturbating while reading twilight. needless to say, im officially out of the closet.
Their flight hasn't even left yet and the 'buy food to keep yourself alive' budget is gone on tequila.
It took 5 minutes to find my bra.. in his car.
If everything I've heard is true, then she's lost her virginity three times
got high to the hills theme song. FEEL THE RAIN ON YOUR SKIN. no regrets.
I am alternating between eating dry cheerios and mint chocolate chip ice cream with a fork. Please love me because no one else will
You know it's been a good thanksgiving when you pee all over your own hands.
It's gonna be ok. As we grow older we sometimes lose sight of what's important to us. Like safe sex. And standards.
Dad stumbling and puking in the White Castle parking lot = Father's Day success
Can I join you for some emotional "Post: The Ohio State University's first lose in football after a 24 game winning streak" sex?
He wants me to tell you "my boner misses you"
Currently on my Sunday walk of shame. Should I go to church?
I woke up with glitter and eggshells in my bed wtf
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